Going through the motions.
When I was going through my difficulties with sleeping and I did not have a diagnosis, one activity was a constant in my life.
A year after I resigned as the co-leader of our Women’s Bible Study at our church, I backed out of the group all together. All of a sudden, I had time on my hands.
A year or so later, my health issues hit a peak and I received my Upper Airway Resistance Syndrome diagnosis.
I was frustrated. Always tired. Never felt rejuvenated. I even skipped church. No one even noticed, since I wasn’t an integral part of Women’s Ministry anymore.
During this time I tended to draw into a hole, and stayed home more. Call it depression? Call it sleep deprivation? I wasn’t going out, socializing and reaching out took too much energy.
God had called me to resign leadership from church to write. Writing was very difficult—I did manage to write now and then and post on my blog. God gave me the grace to write when I was able. Two hours a day I was a functioning adult with brain intact. All the other hours, I was pretty useless.
My standing volunteer gig every week.
But something incredible happened to me every week. On Thursdays I volunteered for four hours at Open Arms Pregnancy Center as a peer advocate. As I dragged myself to the center every Thursday, and some days I was late, moody and holding onto my latte tightly, I was present. I admit I was late for our prayer time. I admit some days I didn’t want to be there.
Each week, God gave me the strength and stamina I needed to be available each Thursday. I met my obligations, ministered to women and was present for them physically and spiritually.
But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded. (2 Chronicles 15:7 NIV)
My giving to the community every Thursday was the best thing I could have done for myself. Giving of myself each week, allowed me to look beyond myself, and look to the needs of others.
I was doing what God wanted me to do each week. I wasn’t very productive 22 hours on my usual days. But on Thursdays, I was productive, present and being used by God for 4-5 hours.
Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. (1 Peter 4:10)
Give yourself and see what happens.
The key: I believe in giving of yourself. Donate a few hours. Pass yourself onto someone else.
There is something healing in giving out instead of taking in.
Colossians 3:17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him. (NIV)