God has it all planned out and when I think I know what I’m doing, many times He shows me I don’t.
I am in the sea of insecurity. My confidence has been tested. I am in the unknown, trying to figure out where I am headed and blinded by my own self-doubt. My identity has been shaken. I find myself in the words I lay before me, but can’t find the same person behind my own skin and bones. I only see the outward me. Who is the inside me?
As I search for the me I once knew, I need to rediscover the new me.
Insecure in her own skin.
Doubting her own path.
Not daring to look into the mirror too long, not sure what she will discover.
Feeling unsure as a woman.
Through my valley and wallowing in my pit, feeling alone and not wanting to move, God has shown me His faithfulness. God has declared His love for me as His daughter. I am the daughter of the King.
When I step into church and wondering where is my place, a place I once felt secured and needed-God reassures me that I am needed. In His kingdom. In His family. God has reminded me, I am His beloved.
My husband’s love for me has never wavered or loosened it’s grip. He is constant and abides by my side through all my moods, desperate pleas of wanting change and cries of an open, wounded heart. He is love.
My husband reassures me that I am deserving of his love and nothing I can do can change or move that love away.
I am thankful. For in my husband is the light of who my Father is. Constant. Unwavering. Loving. Unconditional. God never looks at my outward self and judges me by my expanding waistline. He loves me. He loves me just the way I am. God does not put judgement out there for me to feel defeated or worthless.
To love oneself may be one of the most difficult things to do. I am challenged to love myself as my husband loves me and as God loves me. It was no simple task for God to give us His precious son. For us to have life. To live in freedom. To have the ability to love. For without God’s love, we would be unable to love others and love ourselves.
We love because He first loved us. (1 John 4:19)
My challenge to you today. Love. Yourself.
We are inept in living a nourishing, healthy life, if our selves are left on the curb for anyone to trample over. We nourish our souls by loving ourselves, as Christ has first loved us.
May you walk humbly, but upright. May you be bold in accepting love and offer it right back. May you learn to walk in grace, allowing yourself the imperfections you are burdened to carry.
May you live in grace, walk in grace and breathe in grace.